then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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