I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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