I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
