can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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