paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize