feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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