This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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