Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
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