Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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