I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
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