elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
