is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
