Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
