I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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