yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
