i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Randomize
