it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Randomize
