I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
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