Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
i came on her dog
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
