Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
