You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Randomize
