Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
