Nicole vs. Life
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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