She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
