did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Randomize
