Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
ugly people sure do ruin things
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Randomize
