why didn't you poke me back
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
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