he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
