Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize