i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
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