The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
