I am in a vortex of obligation.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Randomize
