You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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