why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Randomize