I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Randomize
