fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
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