I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
