how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
