So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
