I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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