Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Randomize
