Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Randomize
