: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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