About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
