I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
