i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
