The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Enjoy the penises
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
