so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize
