Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Randomize