you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
it was like eating out sand paper
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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