Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
The Olympian is in my bed
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